Let’s face it… we girls like to deny and fight about the definition that we are “the weak sex”, which we are in many aspects but still feminism and society make us be feisty and angry about that definition.
“Behind a great man there is a great woman.”
That is one of the stereotypes about us, girls.
I am NOT a feminist. I do appreciate the effort and fight my female comrades ( I sound totally communist right now…) in the past century to get us to vote and be seen as “equals” and all that jazz…BUT I do not believe we are equals and rightfully so.
We, girls, are obviously biologically different and mentally we come from another constellation all together.
We are complicated.
We are emotional.
We are hormonal.
We are sensitive and tough at the same freaking time in the same day and sometimes the same moment.
We can be difficult.
We can act incomprehensible.
We can be confusing.
The difference that can change how we interact with BOYS is not that difficult to get:
Yes…that is it :
GIRLS demonstrate emotion AKA we ladies operate and react with the emotion of the moment while
BOYS solve emotional problems on their own AKA gentlemen tend to work out their emotions by finding solutions, and doing things. They are practical and we are NOT…
It is also interesting that we can be typed down as guys can be (BOYS WILL BE BOYS previously posted by me).
The Girl’s Girl
She is not a “girlie” girl. She is the kind of emotional girl who loves other girls’ company and can be seen as the ultimate girl. She is the expert in women emotions and hormonal phases. She would rather be in a group of girls than at the movies with her man. She is the girl who can cry for hours with her girlfriends and is open-hearted to share with her girl everything. She can be feminist to the core and thrive on girlpower in a girlie way…WARNING She might be over emotional and energetic.
The Guy’s Girl
She is the opposite of the GG. She loves to be active and sweat. She is easygoing and very rational. She does not enjoy being around girls and prefers guys as friends. She can look at women with a critical eye. She relates to men… NO…that does not mean she’s a tomboy. She can be but she can be feminine and still behave like a dude. She’s spontaneous and not problematic. She is practical and a buddy to her guy…WARNING..She might not have girlfriends to introduce to your guy friends.
The Power Bitch
She’s the career oriented woman, She’s independent. She does not need a man because she can be a woman and a man at the same time. Her priorities are around herself only. She’s ambitious and focused. She can be a turn on for men. Guys love a challenge and since she does not need YOU …you’ll try to show her wrong. She can be the best partner in setting goals and achieving them. WARNING…She might be too selfish and all about herself… All the time.
and then to my favourite…
The Drama Queen
She overreacts to everything. She might pick up fights just for fun and nothing is simple with her. She is challenging to handle and can kick off at any time. It’s like walking around with a bag full of NITRO…walk carefully because it could explode at any moment. She is fun and not boring at all. She’s unpredictable. Life with her can be full of drama and not boring at all If you can handle that! WARNING…all the above!!!!
Who am I? I am a mix and since all women are complicated…we are all a mix of these women but one might be the dominant trait in our personality.
I might be a Guy’s girl and Drama Empress!!
This comes to my point that I always wondered why it has been difficult if not impossible for me to make and keep friendships with women while I can easily relate to men. I always thought it was only because men are simple and they say what they mean and avoid at all costs complications and BS (bullshit). I also thought it was because a man does not envy a girl and can be direct and honest in criticism and they keep their feeling s always real.
I firmly parade the idea that friendship between a guy (straight) and a girl (straight) can happen and can last. I have proof of that with 3 friends that are guys and are absolutely the best friends I could ever ask and wished for.
Once you past the “I would maybe make a move on you AKA if I get the opportunity I’ll get you drunk unconscious and abuse you” stage in the beginning of the friendship. It’s the stage where either or one is still physically attracted to one another but that phase is just temporary because as they say IF YOU GET IN THE FRIEND-ZONE THERE IS NO WAY OUT. As I would say it’s like throwing a bone to a dog that has just eaten fresh meat, at first he will sniff it than he realizes it has no meat on it and his interest diminishes and it becomes a toy. That’s how it is.
So I can say that guys can be the perfect friends as most women are jealous, canning, complicated. A friendship with another woman can be HARD work and I am lazy. So I gave up many times. I am a pessimist when comes to try to have a female friend and I am (I am a girl so it’s in my nature) very suspicious about why, how, who, where, etc… another woman would want to be my friend. So I do start with a wall of red-lights and warning signs. I get it that it’s not the best start but it proved to be wrong only a few times.
Luckily for me I managed to find one or two that are just like me and with a total LOVE and HONEST friendship we are friends. It has not been easy to find these ladies and they are my sisters now. I thought impossible but hey…there is a little tiny light at the end of the tunnel after all…It might also be that my girl friends are I are the absolute POLAR opposite of each other and we kind of fell in love too.. yes… just like with guys…friends have to fall in some kind of love state…
BUt back to the female thingy…
We, girls, are a universe of contraction. We live by the principle that everything can change in the blink of an eye and we are ruled by hormones. So it’s like poking a hungry tiger with a very sharp and uncomfortably short stick and throw at it a fluffy rabbit covered in blood. It will be shredded to pieces in a heartbeat. We literally swim like a graceful mermaid in the ocean of hypocrisy and don’t even try to point it out because we’ll eat you alive and of course deny it.
PMS ( pre and post menstrual syndrome) is a REAL thing, boys… and it takes a lot of patience and strong will to support it and get how it works so that your and her life is better!!
Even MILK can reduce PMS symptoms 🙂
Just to give an idea of GOT MILK ad campaign realized this little tiny issue with hormones and women:
These are just some AMAZING observations of how we are on the horrible PMS – so please bear with me on this. How possible is that 2 women on PMS can be friends and understand each other when all the forces in the universe are rotating in different directions, pulling , pushing, screaming and kicking…???
That is my point. I would go MAD if I had a friendship with a woman and we are both PMSing, right!??? …Don’t get me wrong. I love being a girl AKA we have a good excuse for any out of ordinary decision, change of heart, inappropriate behavior, etc…
My point is that friendships woman – women DON’T work very well for me.
I tried and kept some that were very similar to me but again the opposite at the same time. Maybe that is the key. (note to self= keep girlfriends that are just like me but not really).
I know…I am a woman so it is complicated!!!! So my ladies friends are opposite in what they like, want and pursue in life but they are just as crazy as I am and we work…as a dysfunctional clock that has too many coocoos but we somehow and mysteriously work!!!
So we like to polymerize on anything. At least I do and I know most girls do to…
As a NOT very emancipated woman – I expect to be given a sit by a man at the bus/tram/train… I expect to have the door opened for me and held as I pass through…I expect a man to carry my bags and offer to help me doing anything (why do you go to the gym to train those muscles for?!!!To carry my bags, thank you!!) and I know that the FEMINIST out there would shoot me in the face just for saying this..I do expect to get a free dinner, flowers and all that men used to feel obliged to do in the 50s…(wait…do you hear that??!! It might be a feminist shooting a location sensitive missile at me…)
Anyway…In a country of feminists – it’s hard enough to get my point across that:
1. NO, I did not burn my bra to state my liberty. To me it looks like a waste of good undergarments.
2. No, I don’t think I can do what men do. A. I’m not as strongly build. B. I don’t want to do what men do even if it means be less paid and less recognized socially. I DO NOT CARE!
So women generally see me as the enemy. And NO, I don’t hate MEN. I love MEN!! I like the way they are, think and can be like us sometimes.
But some women out there are not like that and they HAVE TO make discussion and endless lists about women vs men and how WE gained our rights and still have to fight and BLA BLA BLA…
I am honest… I PMS and I change my mind like a feather changes directions in the wind…
And you would say that being a woman could make it easy for me to understand women. NO, it does NOT.
There are very few women I like and I can talk to without chopping my own head off, or poking my self in the eye with a sharp object or smash my head against a wall when they speak…
But this is all to say that one thing is totally true about women: A compliment from a woman to another is worth 10000000% more than a man’s…because if they really mean it, it comes from the most genuine sincerity and it’s true and pure admiration.
That is because usually when you compliment someone else with the usual – more common:
1. That piece of clothing looks so nice on you – MEANING it makes you look fat like a pregnant whale and it’s the most hideous thing I have ever seen in my life but if you dare to walk out the door wearing that I will get all the (positive) attention for sure since anything I’ll put on even a garbage bag cannot look worst than that.
2. You look very fresh and rested today – MEANING What the heck happened to you? Are those bags under your eyes suitable to carry a piano or it’s just your face looking like you’ve been ran over by a tractor “the look of the day”.
3. I like your shoes – MEANING it I really like them and I hope you will fall from 1456 steps stairs and break your neck so you cannot wear them anymore and I will just take them off your dead broken body.
These are just some daily instances and often used.
But when a woman takes the time and effort (believe it takes the equivalent of an army of elephants) to compliment another woman it’s like angels ringing bells on top of you.
So the “you’re so pretty” said by a woman with no harm intention is meant that she really thinks you are pretty. If a guy would say it (even a guy friend) it would mean “I would totally do you today” or “I’m trying really hard to do you today”.
So just appreciating my ladies when they are genuine and when we can act like a human being and not a hormonal mess… which can be only 2 days out of the month :-)!